im so sick and tored of what's happening with my life. i want some CHANGES. unlike before, i am no longer afraid of whatever effect of CHANGE will bring to my fucking life. i know that there is something store for me but i dont know until when will i going to wait for that BIG MOMENT. nakakainip.
im beginning to HATE my self, to LOOSE trust to myself. and most of all IM LOOSING myself; my OWN SELF. those people around me never considers my feelings. right now, i dont know how to define SANITY to INSANITY anymore. feeling ko wala na ako sa sarili. im weighing myself in between actually.
sawang saw na ako sa buhay ko!
kelan kaya ako ulit liligaya?
tang- *na gusto ko ng magalaho sa mundo.
sana pagtulog ko mamaya hindi nalang ako magising. i hope i'll have a peaceful sleep. im ready to resign myself to fate. OH GOD PLEASE LET ME!
i am no longer afraid of death but i FEAR dying. im afraid of the PAIN and what my LOVED ones have to go through. takot akong mag-suicide baka hindi ako matanggap sa langit at ayokong ako ang gagawa sa ikakamatay ko. kaya lagi nalang akong nagdadasal kay LORD na wag na niya akong pahirapan. kunin na niya ako sa PAGTULOG ko.
my life is in mellow dramatic stage and im painstakingly fighting every sucking time of it. being in DOLDRUMS is not easy you may think. what im going through right now is what i call. MID-LIFE CRISIS.
halo-halo yung gumugulo sa isip ko.
sa CAREER
sa PAMILYA
sa SARILI KO
sa LOVELIFE.
ewan.
sa edad 21, alam mo yun parang kulang sarili ko, parang abnormal, parang kulang ang oras. parang mabagal ang phasing ng buhay ko. parang walang nag-aapreciate at umiintindi sa akin kahit pa alam kong MARAMI AKONG KAIBIGAN pero ASAN SILA NGAYON? KUNG KELAN KAILANGAN KO NG TULONG AT MAKIKINIG sa akin. saan? WALA.
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